Is this dangerous?

Is this dangerous…

  1. If your kid pees in the bath, then drinks the bath water even though you scream at him repeatedly not to?
  2. If your kid opens the oven, pops half her body into it to make loud “waaaaah” and “oooooh” noises because it makes her laugh?
  3. If your kid prefers to jump down from the top of the slide, rather than slide down on his bottom?
  4. If your kid dangles out of your upstairs windows to spit on the ground below?
  5. If they stick their fingers into the DVD player in an effort to make Barney magically appear?
  6. If they stick their tongues onto the freezer drawers and then cry when they get freezer burn?
  7. If they swallow dive down uncarpeted stairs – well, any stairs for that matter?
  8. If they smear themselves with EXPENSIVE age defying moisturiser (which states on the jar “for mature skin”)? 
  9. If your kid sprays toilet spray in his eye?
  10. If they drink cooking oil out of the bottle?
  11. If they eat an unidentified amount of crayons?
  12. If your kid attempts to shave his bum-smooth face like Dad?
  13. If your kid bandages your other kid’s body in a big fleecy Barney blanket and she can’t get out of it, and it’s 30 degrees outside (I did eventually hear her muffled cries, relax).
  14. If they hobble around in an ankle-breaking fashion, in your high heeled shoes.
  15. If they eat a bar of soap like it’s candy (and no, they weren’t blowing bubbles thereafter like in the cartoons).

I’m asking because they think I am the crazy one when I yell and gesticulate wildly when I catch them in the act? And they cry as if they are being abused when I administer their punishment, after said act, as if I am the baddie? Really. So I have to ask the question.. are these Evel Knievel spawn kids from another planet where engaging in death defying activities is the norm…  or is it me?

5 thoughts on “Is this dangerous?”

  1. Haha! It means your kids are normal!!! At least they are not cutting off their “parts” like that email we saw!! Lol xx

  2. I would be trying to keep them clear from 4, 5, 7, 9, 10 & 11 if they do the rest leave them, it won’t kill them, but it will make them strong.

    Please tell me all of this happened in one day?

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