Wow, it’s been a long time since I’ve been here. Life has been one rollercoaster after another these last two weeks, and you know how rollercoasters make you feel – queasy and dizzy. That’s exactly how I’ve been feeling, but thank God He is in control and makes sure I don’t fall out of the rollercoaster, I’m holding on for dear life, but not falling out!
I will spare you the boring details, suffice to say that work has taken on a whole new level of stress. I’m used to separating my work into little boxes, keeping on top of everything in order of importance. I never let my to-do list get too long, I make sure I never have more than 10 unread emails in my inbox at the end of everyday and I pride myself on always getting things done before deadline (well mostly!). I’m a personal assistant to a powerful man, so I need to be super organised and remember about 243 things at once. Which is fine. But with businesses trimming the fat and restructuring and downsizing on manpower while the work load increases, I’ve found myself involved in many other non-personal assistant type of things – which is fine, but there’s only so many hours in a day, right? I’ve always been a leave-work-at-work kind of person but of late, I’ve been working late, coming home grumpy, trying to fix work problems after hours and it’s really just been crazy. That said, I’ve come to grips with the fact that this is not just a busy period, it’s not a special project; the fact is, my work load has significantly increased and this is how it’s going to be. So I have three choices: quit moaning, get used to it and get on with it. Or, carry on the way I have been and slowly kill myself under the pressure of it all. Or, find another job. I don’t want another job and I surely do not want to moan and groan myself into an early grave, so I’ve decided to get on with it. Since doing so, I have already discovered that spending less time on social networks, in itself has already given me a huge chunk of time back. Don’t believe me? Try cut yourself off from Facebook, Twitter, personal emails that bounce back and forth all day, BBM and Whatsapp – you would be amazed! I also know that I am way more productive in the morning than I am after lunch, so I slog away like a good little worker bee and when my stomach starts talking back to me, I know it’s lunch time and I leave my less labour intensive, less brain power required tasks for later in the day. Not always possible when your boss can pop a lovely 128 slide Powerpoint presentation down on your desk for you to fix at any time, but I’m making it work for me. So yes, that’s been work.
On the home front, so much is going on.. Hannah turns two next week. The whole point of a small party away from home was that I didn’t have many things to do, remember? Well even the few things I needed to do, haven’t been done.. I haven’t ordered a cake, haven’t thought about what she is going to wear, and Liam the socialite has his best buddy’s birthday party on the same day so there’s a lot going on on that day.
We have been frantically looking at houses.. this because we came home to find a massive poster outside our complex advertising that our home is officially up for sale. Boy, did that wake us up. So we’ve been looking at houses, talking to agents, browsing the web and generally making contact again with long lost family members in case we need to split up our family because we won’t have a place to stay. Kidding. Not really.
The kids have been really great in all this chaos. They are so bloody awesome. I just love them more and more every day. Liam made me these earrings for Mother’s Day. Ugliest things you’ve ever seen, but every day my boy asks me if I’m going to wear them, so I’ve started wearing them and they’ve actually grown on me. He tells everyone we meet to look at my earrings which really just draws more attention to them, but hey they were made with love. Hannah refuses to call herself a girl. She says she is a good boy, or mommy’s big boy and when she prays she says “pees (please)Jesuzz (Jesus), help me good boy (help me to be a good boy).” Identity crisis much? She has started putting her seat on the toilet and climbing on herself, she is yet to produce a pee, but at least she is getting the idea.
This doesn’t mean that they don’t still drive me crazy, we are at the age where each one must outdo the other. Who can sing the loudest, cry the loudest, tantrum the best, jump the highest – it’s crazy. Going to get myself a good pair of ear plugs and ride this wave.
I need to start reading. I used to eat books for breakfast and now I have to send myself a meeting request to include reading time. My sister in law, who eats books for breakfast, lunch and supper, gave me The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo… I’m on page 10 for the last week, and it starts on page 8. But this too, I will get through! Hubby bought me a much thinner book some time ago, he keeps asking me when I’m going to start reading it and my standard answer has been when I can find time to pee without only going when my bladder starts to tremble in fear, THEN I will pencil in some leisure time to read.
So that’s where I’m at. What I have discovered is that I love blogging, and what started as a past time has become an integral part of my life. I NEED to journal and express myself here in my little piece of cyberspace because it makes me feel sane and allows me to vent and put things down which in turns adds perspective that isn’t always clear when it’s just you and the voices in your head.
So when life gets crazy, what do I do? I go to the Source! Here’s what the Word of God says…
2 Corinthians 4: 16 – 18 MSG
So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever.