The first time ever I saw your face, I thought the sun rose in your eyes…
Liam, my baby love, you are my heart. I look at you and I can’t believe that I had a hand in your creation. You are a beautiful boy, both inside and out. You have given me the best four years of my life. I can’t believe you are four already, I remember holding you for the first time like it was yesterday. You were the sweetest baby, I could stare at you for hours and hold you for as many, even though everyone said I was spoiling you by carrying you all the time. You kept me up at night, and drove me crazy during the day, but I wouldn’t change one thing about you. Maybe it’s because you were my first born, maybe it’s because I see so much of me in you, but you are my favourite and only son. You delight me in ways my heart didn’t register until I became a mother. You give me this deep satisfaction just by being. I want to protect you, fight your battles for you, keep you under my wing forever. But as you grow, it’s your independence that most takes my breath away. So I let you explore, I loosen the strings ever so slightly and let you be. I wish you would stay this age, this way, forever. Your infectious laughter, your crazy questions, your effervescent personality. I love how people love you. You are so smart and mature beyond your years that sometimes I forget you are only a little boy – believe it or not, you have solved many a problem of mine with your simple and plain answers and I think to myself, why didn’t I think of that? But you are also a mischievous, rough-and-tumble, farting-burping boy’s boy! Bringing worms from the garden into my clean kitchen and stealing your sister’s dolls and digging out their eyes. Pulling your bottom lip out, stomping across the wooden floors and banging your bedroom door when you don’t get what you want. Oh, you can be trouble!
I would move mountains for you, I would break my back for you, I would lay down my life for you … for you, I would “kill-a da bull.” Gladly. You are my son, an extension of me, my life’s work, a masterpiece, fearfully and wonderfully made under The Potter’s Hand. I am so proud of you, I am so proud of ME because of the person you make me. Not the screaming, yelling person you make me (because you do make my blood boil sometimes son) – the other person you make me… you make me kind and gentle and loving even when I don’t particularly want to be. You calm my beating heart and make me laugh after a horrible day. You break the silent treatment I try to enforce when I’m being particularly awful and you’ll tell me that everything will be fine, even when you don’t know the source of my frustration or pain – and you are usually right.
This birthday, I am grateful that we have both made it through a whole ‘nother year! I am grateful that I get to spend this day with you, celebrating the wonderful person that you are. Thank you for being such a good boy, a good big brother and a source of light to everyone you encounter. My prayer for you is that you will continue to sparkle wherever you go and in whatever you do. That you will feel the love you so readily show to others. That no harm in any form will come upon you, that you will live long and healthy and be a blessing to others, just as you are a most incredible blessing to me.
Happy 4th birthday son.
Assuring you of my constant love and affection.
This slideshow of you made me cry! My perfect son! Thank you God for Liam John!