A new series: Conversations I never hope to have


I have this friend. We’ve known each other pretty much since grade 1. Sub A as they called it in those days. Anyway he owns his own agency and he’s pretty cool and smart. When I have writer’s block, I go to him for inspiration. Yesterday morning, I had one of those moments where I needed some inspiration and my posts in draft where not looking very appealing. After a rather dismal week with lots of bad news and lots of work stress, I couldn’t get the juices flowing. After just three tries, he came up with this cool suggestion on a new series I’m going to be blogging about. This from the same dude who brought you the “Dear Big Liam and Big Hannah” series.

So in between my usual rants and raves, you’ll be seeing a post here and there on conversations I never hope to have with my kids. I could totally go buck wild with this. I’ve already had many conversations that I didn’t particularly want to have with my kids and no doubt there are LOTS more to come – some necessary, some serious, some embarrassing, some scary, some funny and some that will probably have us both in tears.

But to get the ball rolling, let’s start off on a “tolly”- I mean jolly note, here’s a conversation with my 4 year old that I am NOT looking forward to. One that I’ve been thinking about for a while, but just haven’t had the energy to approach.

And I will perhaps have to delete this post when he comes of reading age…

My son is now 4 years old and un.circum.cised. According to my research and what I was told by my then pediatrician, it is around this age (although it does differ from male to male) that the skin is most likely able to retract. Yes, it is a self cleaning tool until such a time where the skin is retractable and needs to be cleaned. I will then have to have this conversation with him, probably with Hannah in the bathroom because they bath together, about how to handle his bits. I am by no means a prude, and we try not to (visibly) cringe  and shy away from any topics they may raise, but this is one of those.. um.. touchy subjects. Because…

If anyone has been reading long enough, they will know that my son and daughter let nothing go without thorough investigation and interrogation with the prowess of professional sleuths. Believe me when I say this will not be a simple show and tell. There will be questions like: Why? How come? Since when? But why? And what if I forget? And what about Hannah? Do all boys do it? But whyyyy?

And I fear what Liam’s news will be in the next day’s “morning ring” at school.

Perhaps straight shooting, non emotional, clinical Daddy should have this conversation alone with Liam. Yes? A boy to boy conversation.

Any of you with un.circum.cised boys? Have you had to have this conversation with your son yet?

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6 thoughts on “A new series: Conversations I never hope to have”

  1. Well

    We’ve been teaching the pull back and clean thing since the boys turned . they dont like to do it, and get very angry when you attempt to clean.

    The other Day, Naked Calum, who had wet his bed and found a spot in our bed, turns to me, proud as ever “look mommy, look what i did”, he had pulled the skin back and done it all by himself and happy. Now to explain why not to do it in moms bed and only in the bathroom. But “Why Mommy, you said thats what i must do???”…

  2. As you might know my husband is a urologist – he tells me not to let the child yank on the foreskin, and that it’s from 4-ish that the foreskin starts to be able to retract. So just tell him to gently pull it back in the bath as far as it goes. That’s what w are doing, and it’s no issue at all. good luck

  3. tell you what, let your hubby do the talk and then you all come over and he and D can have the talk with Connor and all the questions SURE to follow, and us girls can run around taking pics of our little ladies. Now there’s a good plan!

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