I’ve been toying with this idea of downsizing for a long time. I’m not even sure I know the full extent of what downsizing entails but the idea of LESS is becoming more and more appealing to me.
As I get older, as I see my children bloom into their life’s purpose , I can’t help but wonder if this is it? What started as a whisper somewhere deep inside of me is becoming louder and louder and it’s a voice saying that no, this is not it! This life which Christ came to bring us is not just THIS. He has purposed us for life, life in abundance. And abundance of GOOD things. Not an abundance of strife, debt, getting by, working long hours, tiredness. No. Good things. When I sit down and truly consider the things that cause me strife, I see that they are the things that I don’t need to have in my life anyway and since I invited them in, I have every right to kick them out.
You know you read these stories of people who just sell up everything and start over by living really simple lives. People who left the Big City to go live on farms and home school and grow their own food and basically turn Hippy (sorry to all the hipsters). Now while I don’t want to get any closer to Mother Nature than going for a walk in the local park, I have to admit that the idea of being FREE is really tantalising.
All those romantic notions of “it’s not the size of your house, but the people who are in” and “my home is where YOU are;” call me crazy but all of a sudden I really believe them. Why stay in a house, spend a fortune for it’s upkeep, spend a fortune on a bond for the best 20 years of your life, have beautiful crystal glasses to drink out of on special occasions, drive a fancy car when you have to work REALLY REALLY hard to afford all those things and… then you die? And don’t get me wrong, I LOVE nice things, I really do. I love making my home beautiful and impressing my visitors with my fancy place mats and I like working really hard too. But quite suddenly, I’m questioning my reasons, I’m questioning my choices. I think I’d prefer to work really really hard for experiences with my husband and kids – like travel opportunities and amazing holidays and SEEING the world and doing all those things in my very city which we never do versus fancy cushions in my living room. Again, there’s no judgement here, for the last few years all I’ve whinged about is getting a fancy new kitchen in my house, so if that’s you, I pray you get your fancy kitchen soon! But I think I’ve reached a point where I want to live simply in order to be free from stress and to free up my time, my efforts, my finances for things which I hold dear to me.
My thoughts are muddled, my ideas are hazy, but my mind races at the thought of being FREE. I want to live in the full freedom that Christ offers, first spiritually but secondly all that comes with that freedom. Free from other people’s opinions, free from doing things because the Jones’s say we need to do it, free from wanting things because that’s what the magazines and the TV say we need to have, free from debt and from the fear of not having enough money. Free from the fear of “lack.”
It’s not impossible, I know people who have taken hold of this idea and who are flourishing, people who are living their best lives, simply. Other’s may see their lack as limiting and sad, but in their lack they have actually found the best kind of freedom.
I suppose I’d view this differently had my surname being Oppenheimer or Branson, but I’m talking about myself as a normal middle class wife and mother in a normal middle class family (depending on what you consider normal of course). Times are tough and if the Word is to be believed, times are only going to get tougher, I don’t want to be suckered any more into this shiny sparkly white picket fence dream about how I should be living. I want to just LIVE. My best life. NOW.