Tag Archives: blogging

Why I can’t be a mommy blogger anymore.


I mean this as no offence to my friends who have mommy blogs. You carry on wit yo bad selves, do yo thang, guurl.

I used to read blogs like fashion interns read Cosmo. A lot. Then I stopped. It was also at this point that I stopped writing. The two are interconnected in that the more I read about other people’s lives, the less I wanted to share about my own. It became dull and boring; we were all saying the same thing. And let’s be honest for a second, we were all advertising the same product sponsored by the same brand. Aside from that, it’s also connected to the fact that the older my children get, the less “help” and validation I need. Also, I have no right to infringe on my children’s privacy any longer. I started this blog as a way to document the early years of my children’s lives. As my blog name suggests, I wanted this to be a space for them to relish the good, the bad and the ugly of their first few years as humans. I think I have achieved that goal. They are now at the age where I feel I owe it to them to decide if they want the WWW to know about their lives or not. I’m not disconnecting from social media  – I mean IG gives me LIFE, but I do not feel obliged to share the intimate details of our lives on this space any longer. I must be getting old.

If I must be honest, I far more enjoy IG for a picture and snippet of what’s going on in your life. I just cannot read another long blog post about what you did today or what you had for dinner or what’s going on in your life currently. When my kids were little, it was wonderfully cathartic to spew everything out in this space. So I get that, I do. But I’ve evolved, my interests have evolved. And I’ve evolved as a writer. I’m more interested in your opinion on current affairs, your religious views and what shaped them, why you think the way you do and who told you it was right. I’ve not gone completely Oprah, it appears I can’t shake off my offbeat Freudian vibe as hard as I try, so I’m all about human behaviour… I want to know what keeps you up at night, what gets you going in the morning, what’s your favourite song and why. You see, I thirst after stories that make you, YOU. Stories that leave me feeling SOMETHING. Good or bad. I love a story that enlightens me, evokes emotions and stirs up a response that makes me want to leave a long-ass comment underneath your post. I feel like my stories weren’t doing that. And don’t get me wrong, your little space on the internet is YOURS. You can do whatever the heck you want to with that space; this is about me. So yes, my stories were becoming tedious and dull. But I still want to write. Bloggers say our blogs are for us and that may be true. But give me a break, our blogs are for the readers, we want our blogs to be read by others, we want to see our stats rising and we want to see commentators saying things like “yes, I identify, preach it sister!” or “your opinion sucks” or whatever. Blogging is symbiotic. Otherwise we’d write in journals or on typewriters and never hit the share button, right?

Where am I going with is?

I’m changing things up around here. I want to write about stuff that baffles my brain so that you can help me formulate answers. I want you to unequivocally know my hard limits and to challenge me on those. I don’t want to advertise anything unless it’s something I’d actually pay hard cash for myself. I want to use this space for lots of naval gazing, for spewing out rhetoric on things that make me froth at the mouth.

This will no longer be a memoir for my munchkins.

I may use my children to illustrate a point here and there… they are fine specimens and my greatest teachers, and I may use motherhood as an interlude because I think my experience could teach you a lot about how NOT to do life.

And I don’t know much more than that.

2017 will be the year of completion and transformation. Please hang around while I figure this blogging thing out. I hope you’ll respond in the way you always have, I hope my mommy blogger-friends aren’t going to snub me in aisle #3 in Dis-chem after reading this. It’s because of you that this blog even exists. Join me on this metamorphosis and let’s see which *rabbit hole we’ll go down together.

Xxx

*Rabbit hole may refer to: “Down the rabbit hole”, a metaphor for an entry into the unknown, the disorienting or the mentally deranging, from its use in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. a slang expression for a psychedelic experience.

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#Jozimeetup


Let me start by saying that I know lots of people, including my very dear husband, who simply don’t get this whole social media / blogging / tweeting / IG’ing / FB’ing thing. He doesn’t get that I “know” people in my computer/phone when I haven’t even met them in real life. When I talk to him about so-and-so and the issue they are having and he asks “who is this person who you know but I don’t – who you know so intimately” and then he answers his own question with “oh wait, it’s one of the people in your phone”.  It’s gotten to the stage where he actually “knows” some of the people in my phone because I talk about them at home as if they were old family friends.

I have a friend who had a mild panic attack when I mentioned I was meeting up with a lady for the first time who I had met online. She was horrified that I would just meet up with a complete stranger who I didn’t even know. Practically the same thing as internet dating and we ALL know someone who met a CRAZY person through internet dating, right?!

But this is different. Through blogging I have met and know some ladies and their families more intimately than I know some of the people in my “real” life. Some of them I have met in person and they have turned out to be really good friends. Others I have never met IRL but we talk every other day, we know what’s going on in each other’s lives, we know each other’s children and we know each other’s challenges. We celebrate each other’s victories and share in each other’s sorrows.

When I first started blogging it was all about me. It was about leaving something for my kids to treasure in time to come. But that has evolved. Yes, it’s still the reason I write, but I also write to share my experiences, because I know there are girls out there (and some guys believe it or not) who could benefit from my little ol’ tales. People who can identify and also people who help ME and offer such good advice!

Basically, through this blog I have met some really nice people in the world!

And that rather long prelude was to bring me to the point of telling you about the #Jozimeetup. Sharon, Laura and Wenchy managed this event which saw tons of bloggers, tweeters and social media gals come together. I’m not going to get all soppy and say these events are like family reunions but I will say that it’s almost like it!! It’s like meeting up with a person you feel you have known forever but haven’t had a chance to meet up with IRL. It’s funny and weird putting a personality to a face you only know through photos! It was a lovely morning, meeting new faces and catching up with old. I wish I could have stayed longer because I didn’t get to interact with everyone I would have liked to because there were so many pretty faces there! And meeting the babies! That was the best part. We follow these little ones online, we know about their sleeping schedules, how many teeth they have, what diapers they use, and yet we’ve never squished their cheeks IRL! I enjoyed all the babies!

We were also spoilt with an amazing goody bag in the form of a personalized tote filled with delicious goodies. TOO LOVELY! All in all a successful morning and I can’t wait for the next one! Thanks to the ladies who organised!