Is this dangerous…
- If your kid pees in the bath, then drinks the bath water even though you scream at him repeatedly not to?
- If your kid opens the oven, pops half her body into it to make loud “waaaaah” and “oooooh” noises because it makes her laugh?
- If your kid prefers to jump down from the top of the slide, rather than slide down on his bottom?
- If your kid dangles out of your upstairs windows to spit on the ground below?
- If they stick their fingers into the DVD player in an effort to make Barney magically appear?
- If they stick their tongues onto the freezer drawers and then cry when they get freezer burn?
- If they swallow dive down uncarpeted stairs – well, any stairs for that matter?
- If they smear themselves with EXPENSIVE age defying moisturiser (which states on the jar “for mature skin”)?
- If your kid sprays toilet spray in his eye?
- If they drink cooking oil out of the bottle?
- If they eat an unidentified amount of crayons?
- If your kid attempts to shave his bum-smooth face like Dad?
- If your kid bandages your other kid’s body in a big fleecy Barney blanket and she can’t get out of it, and it’s 30 degrees outside (I did eventually hear her muffled cries, relax).
- If they hobble around in an ankle-breaking fashion, in your high heeled shoes.
- If they eat a bar of soap like it’s candy (and no, they weren’t blowing bubbles thereafter like in the cartoons).
I’m asking because they think I am the crazy one when I yell and gesticulate wildly when I catch them in the act? And they cry as if they are being abused when I administer their punishment, after said act, as if I am the baddie? Really. So I have to ask the question.. are these
Evel Knievel spawn kids from another planet where engaging in death defying activities is the norm… or is it me?