I like making a quick buck. Who doesn’t? If there’s money to be made, I want in on that action! With this thought in mind, I was pondering the many milestones my babies have reached and how so many items and accessories have now become obsolete in my household. When I think of the thousands of Rands we spent on all this paraphernalia that’s now just cluttering up my garage, it makes me want to have another baby just so that I can get my money’s worth. What? Did I just say that? Slip of the finger.. If God so wills, I trust my family is COMPLETE! But seriously, being the frugal tightwad that I am, I am considering having a garage sale or opening a second hand baby store to get something out of this baby business.
Why not donate it or give it to another family having a baby, you ask. Let me state for the record, that I have graciously offered my leftovers, but these days ALL NEW parents want ALL NEW goodies – especially for their first born baby! I have given many things away to charities and to those less fortunate, I’ve even boxed old clothes and sent them as far as rural KZN, but now I think I’m going to get my own back and start a mini business selling baby leftovers. I could call it “Used But Not Abused” or “Worn But not Torn” or “Hand Me Down Couture.” Ok, the name needs work but that’s the least of my worries, my leftovers will actually sell themselves!
Presently I am hoarding a walking ring, a feeding chair, a car seat, NUK bottles which Liam has outgrown, a Bumbo seat, a breastfeeding pillow, a changing mat, toys for every age, clothes and shoes galore, a breast pump (missing one small vital part, but I won’t tell if you won’t – hey sales is a cutthroat business). I have cot linen in all shades and colours, and receiving blankets upon fleecy blankets upon crotched blankets, a humidifier which I must admit was a real blessing for a croupy baby, but now stands stagnant. Bottle warmers, flasks, dummies in an array of colours and shapes, nappy stackers and a cupboard dedicated to baby bags – for what? What about all the items that looked useful at the time but actually proved to be useless – like the bath ring which both my children couldn’t stand to sit in, the cupboard locks that both my Macgyvers could unlock, small umbrellas – children don’t know what umbrellas are even for, they think it’s fun to get wet in the rain, not cover themselves up – DON’T EVER BUY YOUR KID AN UMBRELLA, no matter how cute it looks in the store, it’s a waste.
What irks me the most is that babies grow so quickly that you spend very little time at every stage, so just as your baby starts to enjoy something, they outgrow it! Hannah spent a lot of time just “lumping” in her walking ring, then she realised her car could take her places, but no sooner had she made this discovery, she started walking and we said goodbye to the walking ring. I’m beginning to think that babies should be left to run around naked in their first year of life and perhaps we could wrap them in a piece of cloth during Winter – they sprout so quickly out of their clothes. I have many beautiful treasured outfits that neither of them wore, because I was saving it for a “special” occasion – only for them to have outgrown it by the time that occasion came around.
So that’s it, I am opening shop! If you’re looking for previously loved baby goods, in excellent condition, I’m your (wo)man! I’ll make a fortune and probably spend my riches on more useless kids stuff. It just doesn’t end until they actually pack up and leave home and get their own garage to fill with useless stuff.